


The Bird In The Cage

by TwistedViolets



Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Allison dreams of the limelight, Angst, Grace is a good mother, Klaus is an up and coming junkie, Luther is a frustrated sad boy, ShawShank Redemption reference, Vanya makes Five’s sandwiches, Vanya misses Five, general sad themes, thats the whole fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-03
Updated: 2019-12-03
Packaged: 2021-02-26 00:00:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,629
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21664105
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TwistedViolets/pseuds/TwistedViolets
Summary: Five never came back the next day nor the next. Vanya waited though, waited and waited.Sometimes she would pull up a chair to the window, cross her arms on the lip and place her head on her arms. She'd watch the streets, watch the people, hoping to see her brother's face in the crowd.Days pass, months pass, and just like the crudely drawn umbrella on her wrist his image blurs, fades, and needs to be reapplied. She does so in small doses to keep herself from crying.Her father...and even her siblings on the other hand push his memory away.
Kudos: 41





	The Bird In The Cage

**Author's Note:**

> This is a fic I just worked on whenever I felt like it-over the course of a month and a half. I like it but it’s sad. I hope you enjoy anyway!
> 
> Sidenote- I never planned on uploading this fic so I ended up using two of the paragraphs in another one of my fics. Just Incase you noticed, yes, I did do that.

These sandwiches he liked, she makes them every day. Marshmallow insides, the kind that he had always said just melted on his tongue in the right way. Her mother sat up with her most nights, holding her hand and patting her hair as they waited.

It made her self conscious, to know that she needed to do this to keep her sanity, to keep up hope that he would return. Her siblings tried not to talk about him, they ignore his room. The door was shut and rarely ever opened unless their mother was cleaning.

She stares at his door often, just imagining him on the other side. Talking about equations she doesn't understand or how he could have done the mission all by himself. She imagines him talking but no matter how long she listens he never comes out.

She's just chasing a phantom, a ghost of who he was, who he still is wherever he ended up.

Her heart aches and she has to look away from his door. That room holds too many memories now, his scent, his style, his belongings. That room is his and it will always be.

————————————————————

She holds the umbrella over her father, the rain pours down on her, soaking her to the bone- leaving an icy cold shiver through her spine. 

Her father doesn't acknowledge her, he barely even gives her a second glance. She strains her arm and occasionally stands on her tippy toes to keep the umbrella over him but he doesn't even say thanks.

She knows that this is a privilege, to be outside, to go with him and that's why there are no thanks. It's a privilege, not a right so she has to earn her keep.

She watches her siblings smile at the crowd, she watches them wave. She watches them be interviewed as if they didn't have a care in the world.

They don't even acknowledge the spot between Klaus and Ben. The gap of space they leave for a person they don't speak of.

It hurts to watch. 

Her hand falters, just for a moment but that's all it takes for a few water droplets to fall on her father. He turns to her, actually acknowledging her with a glare.

"Sorry!" She says as she moves in closer and raises the umbrella over him again.

His staring doesn't stop.

She looks down muttering more apologies.

"What occupies your thoughts today?" He asks although it sounds more like a statement. It's as if he's saying she gets no choice in answering it.

She blows out a breath, clenching the hand around the umbrella as she speaks. "It's so quiet now...without Five."

Her father looks towards her siblings for a moment before looking back at her. "I suppose it is rather peaceful as of late."

She nods, agreeing. Five was always the rebel, always the narcissist, always the trouble maker who doubled as a self-proclaimed god. He thought he was perfect, that he could do anything. 

He got want he wanted didn't he? She likes to imagine he did even if it hurts. He left, time traveled, he got what he wanted and that's why he never came back right?

Nothing at home is worth coming back for...not even his family.

She clenches her eyes together, stopping her eyes from tearing up.

————————————————————

"It's all your fault Five disappeared!" Luther seethes at her, glaring while clenching a fist up.

It's been so long since she heard someone else say his name.

"What?" She stutters, taking a step back, holding a plate that houses Five's favorite sandwich. She was going to go sit on the steps and wait for him again. 

She did it every chance she could.

"You keep making those stupid sandwiches because you're guilty! You must have driven him away and you know it!" His tone is full of pent up frustration.

She trembles, taking a step back as she looks to the floor. "I didn't." She says, her eyes tearing up at the mere suggestion.

It isn't her fault.

He didn't leave because of her.

She didn't want him to leave.

"You're a pathetic liar!"

Red hot tears roll down her face as anger sparks inside of her. She takes a step towards him. "I cared about him just as much as you do! I'd never do anything like that!"

She huffs a breath before turning and opening the door. She slams it behind her and plops down on the steps. Her tears blurring her vision as they fall on the bread.

She cries as her heart feels as if it's about to pop.

Stupid Luther.

————————————————————

The first time she sees his door open in almost three months she almost cries right then and there. But anger overtakes her before she has a chance to break down.

Her siblings climb out his window.

They use his room like it's just a doorway between the outside world and their house. They don't value it like it's important, they don't treasure it as she does.

They step on the floors with dirt-covered shoes and they stink it up with the smell of alcohol and cigarettes.

She hates it so much.

She hates it yet, she's afraid to say anything.

So she just watches as they ruin something she held so close to her heart.

————————————————————

Her siblings have started talking about leaving for good. Diego talks about joining the police force, Allison wants to be a movie star, and Klaus says anywhere is better than here.

It's hard for her to admit she wants to leave too because this is it. This place is her home, it houses all of his memories. She knows after she leaves she'll never be able to return so it hurts to think about.

One day she knows she'll leave, one day she'll get away from her ordinary stigma, one day she'll be strong enough to say that she doesn't need to be here.

That day is far away but it will come.

"I'll fit in modeling between movies," Allison says to her, grinning as she brushes her hair.

"It sounds nice," she says as she smiles back.

Someday she'll be a violinist. She'll have the freedom to do that. To live her own life without judgment from her siblings or her father.

She wonders if Five would be proud of her, if she walked the path of doing what she wants.

————————————————————

"Where do you think he went?" She says, a book in her hand but her mind wandering elsewhere.

"Probably the future," Diego hums as he tosses his knife up before catching it. "He's probably running the world by now."

She smiles, returning to her book although she isn't reading it. Her mind won't stop wandering to Five, to the place he ended up and the reason he hasn't come back.

It's hard to think about.

"I hope so," she swallows as she shuts the book and places it in her lap. She scrapes her nails over the book's edge as he leaves the room without another word. There isn't anything to say.

"Five," she mumbles, closing her eyes and remembering him although it's hard. She knows he has confidence, he has an ego, maybe he's hard-headed but he was good. He was her favorite brother, is still her favorite brother.

————————————————————

Klaus hasn't been around lately. He's been off into the real world, getting drunk and high. He only comes back when he gets hurt or he's hungry.

She misses him.

It's as if's running away too and it hurts. She doesn't want him to leave like Five did, that'd be too much to handle.

Their father doesn't do as much as he used to although she wishes he would. Maybe if their father was harsher Klaus would stay.

She feels bad thinking that.

"Do you ever think about Five?" She asks one night while Klaus is applying a thick coat of pink nail polish to his nails. He shrugs as his eyes stay steady on his hands.

"I think about him," she says, her hands instinctively twist and turn in her skirt. Klaus hums, acknowledging her words.

"He was so kind and dignified."

Klaus snorts as he begins to laugh. "Please Five, dignified? He had an ego the size of the sun."

She nods, smiling as he screws the cap on the nail polish. "I'll tell you what Five was," he says as he throws the nail polish on the bed. "He was a bird caught in a cage," he blows on his newly painted nails.

"He just wasn't one that was meant to be caged."

————————————————————

She pulls up a chair to the window and sits, placing her arms against the window lip and then gingerly places her head on them. She sits in silence, just watching the crowd for him.

Sometimes she swears she can see him, walking in the crowd, looking at her...and mouthing words. Telling her how stupid she is for reapplying her fake Umbrella Academy tattoo again and again. Sometimes he tells her to move on, to stop hovering around this window because he's not coming back.

She doesn't listen to him because she knows it's just her anxiety talking. Her broken heart just trying to find some way to heal its self. She doesn't want to forget him or just move on though.

She just wants him to come home safe and sound. That's all she's ever wanted.

A blanket is thrown over her shoulders and her mother kisses her head. "Don't sit here all day sweetheart," she says, rubbing her shoulders before she leaves to cook dinner.

She nods back although she intends to stay here until she sees something, anything. She misses him too much for her heart to take.

**Author's Note:**

> This hasn’t officially been checked over for typos yet so my apologies until I get there <3


End file.
